Single Moms and Loneliness
So here I am, up before the crack of dawn. Seriously the sun has not even shown it’s shine yet this morning and I have been up all night. Why am I up you ask? Well I do not have an answer for that, I just am. But as I laid in bed desperately wishing that sleep will find me I had the urge to blog something.
As you may or may not know I am a single mother and tonight, well this morning, the thought of being lonely in a room full of people is on my mind. Now do not get me wrong I do not have a problem with being alone as I am very much an introvert. I am perfectly fine with having alone time. But have you ever been in a room full of friends and family and still be lonely?
I try to be encouraging and motivating but loneliness is a subject that may or may not affect single mothers and bringing some attention to the subject may be helpful to someone. So what can one do to escape the feeling of loneliness. There are a few things that can help in getting yourself out of that state of feelings. Below I have listed three tips that can help.
Know Thy Self
We as single moms may have a habit of revolving our lives around our children. Our free time can be spent running behind the children one way or the other, football practice, orchestra recitals, martial arts classes and helping with homework. I need every single mother reading this, every mother who may come across this actually, to know and understand this one major fact, KNOW THY SELF! It is OK to have a life outside of your children. It is OK to meet up and have girls night out, or even to have a spa day alone if you would prefer. Know what it is you like to do when there are no kids around. I remember an occasion or two when my children were younger, they would spend the night with friends or be out of town with family for the weekend leaving me alone at home. I think I may have even posted about it on social media, the post went something along the lines of “the kids are gone and I have nothing to do… at home bored.” Why was I at home bored? The kids were gone; well, because everything was about them and do not get me wrong I love my kids and there is nothing wrong with that but you also have to remember to take time for yourself. It is perfectly OK to take care of you. So tell me, what do you like to do in your alone time?
Develop New Relationships
Be open to new relationships. I must admit that this is not easy for me. I would believe that I am friendly and approachable, it’s just not easy to develop those new relationships. I’ll gain acquaintances rather easily, but relationships, not so much. The reason I encourage developing relationships versus acquaintances is that relationships allows for connections and a sense of belonging. You will have someone you know that is in your corner. Someone who will listen and understand where you come from. Someone who will add value to your life. These relationships are another way leaving that sense of loneliness behind.
The previous tip as well as this one may seem quite obvious, but go out. Being social or being out and about in general will help with the feeling of boredom. Call up your closest friends, or some close family members and find something to do for the night. The first tip was to know what it is you like to do, so you can do those things together with those friends.
Remember that loneliness is not a forever thing. Do what you need to do to get out from that spirit of loneliness. Loneliness is of no benefit to you nor your family as it can lead to depression amongst other things. Know yourself, be open to new relationships and enjoy a night out, it is OK, I promise.
Always remember while on this Single Momma Journey,
YOU GOT THIS!